A question posed to Dr. Deepak Chopra by a reader of Times of India.
“ I am a 25 year old unmarried man. I read your fortnightly column regularly and want to ask a general question. What is marriage? What factors should individuals consider before getting married, no matter of it is a love marriage or arranged marriage?"
This question along with Dr. Chopra’s response appeared in Times of India dated 21st March, 2010.
While admiring the response of Dr. Chopra, this question has tempted me to share a chapter from my work “Don’t Regret Later”, even though it does not appear in the present edition of the book, which caters mainly to the senior school students.
Real Meaning of Marriage
To make a man happy , a woman has to be loving, compassionate and very sympathetic. She has to stimulate his mind and keep him alert and interested. Most of all she has to inspire him to reach for the stars – Dame Barbara Cartland
A great marriage is not when the perfect couple comes together. It is when an imperfect couple learns to enjoy their differences – Dave Mecerer
It would be worth the while to consider the entire process leading to a ceremony called “marriage”, quite typically in our society.
The parents of the eligible grooms and brides generally have predefined standards of elimination/selection of the prospective families considered worthy enough to be ‘acquired’ or ‘merged with’. Their net worth, market standing in terms of social status, place of domicile, mother tongue, religion, and even caste (who says the caste system is dead?) are the primary common factors applicable to both brides as well as the grooms side of the families.
For prospective grooms – their physical statistics, color of skin, present earnings, and the future potential earnings, education are another factors considered. If he smokes and drinks occasionally, and has friends belonging to the opposite sex, then these do raise some eyebrows. If he is working abroad, then his net worth goes up exponentially (who says foreign brands do not command a premium)
For the prospective brides, the critical minimum determinants are the physical characteristics which would include the length of the hair, the color of her skin, and the health of eyes (the moral right to wear spectacles is perhaps restricted to males only)
After these conditions are met, comes the next stage – which is matching of the horoscopes . (How many of us recollect those predictions by learned astrologers in our own cases, which actually came true? Then why do we rely so much on these documents when it comes to the most critical decision of our life, which can make or mar not only our own lives but also those of the immediate relations as well? By the way, today’s youths pride themselves of being far better educated and being better informed than their previous generations.)
The period of courtship which follows immediately after the engagement ceremony is generally treated as nothing but a social sanction to date. No wonder it is called the best period in marital life. If only it were treated as an occasion for frank discussions, and familiarizing each other with the family cultures, intended lifestyles etc. to create realistic expectations on both sides, things would be far better for the young couple post marriage. And should any serious indication of non compatibility between the two come up, then the young couple should seriously reconsider the proposed plan to go ahead and tie the knot. Without aiming to sound pessimistic, it needs to be emphasized that broken engagement is any day far better than a unhappy marriage.
The ceremonies that follow are nothing but a means of decadent exhibitionism aimed at claiming a higher status in the society, of which we ourselves are not convinced about . ( Who says showmanship is restricted to the world of entertainment?).
In most of the cases , right from the time an alliance is finalized till the wedding ceremony is over, the usual topic of discussion within the families involved as well as others , includes : what all the other side has gifted to their respective son in law and daughter in law, the quantity and quality of various wedding related functions organized by the bride’s and the groom’s side of the family, the likely expenses incurred in each function, etc etc. This lasts only for a few days after the wedding related ceremonies are over, as people move on with their lives and usually forget what they saw, what they ate in all those functions.
When the newly married couple returns from their honeymoon, they now face the reality , and the acid test begins.
Now, irrespective of the number of functions which the bride and the groom’s side had organized, irrespective of the amount of money spent by each side on those extravaganzas, irrespective of the number and profile of the guests who attended those functions, and irrespective of the showmanship exhibited by each side on those functions, the one and only one critical factor which can now bring happiness, satisfaction, peace of mind, and a sense of fulfillment to the newly married couple as well as to their respective parents is –
“ Has the young couple passed the acid test, and have proved to each other that they are truly made for each other, and can now live happily ever after? ”
Isn’t it a sheer miracle , if the marriages solemnized after such series of tests have the capacity to withstand the harsh realities of life such as the cultural differences between the families, bloated expectations of not only of the bride and the groom with each other, but also of their respective families from each other ?
It is amazing that the bride is often subjected to a microscopic scrutiny right after the return from honeymoon , and is expected to perform from day one in accordance to the culture of the family she is married into. Any deviation from the norm which may happen out of sheer innocence on the part of the bride is looked down upon. The real culprits behind such issues are generally those who are very closely related to the family of the groom, and who just want to make life miserable for the newly married couple .
The fallouts of such marriages include – extra marital affairs, confused and underdeveloped children, and loss of self esteem which can play havoc with one’s life etc.
No doubt, the so called ‘love marriages’, which defy the conventional method of arranging marriages as detailed above, also do run into problems. The solution does not lie in discarding one method in favor of another. Rather it calls for a realization that a marriage is not just a passport to a high social and economic status.
It is a union of two minds and souls deciding to partner with each other to fight the battle of life, which ends only in the grave. The bodies in which such souls and minds live, need not profess the same faith, speak the same mother tongue, or originate from the same society.
A marriage that actually results in such a union could be the best possible dowry for the groom, and best possible home for the bride.
Big Deal, isn’t it?
Saturday, March 27, 2010
“ I am a 25 year old unmarried man......"
A question posed to Dr. Deepak Chopra by a reader of Times of India.
“I am a 25 year old unmarried man. I read your fortnightly column regularly and want to ask a general question. What is marriage? What factors should individuals consider before getting married, no matter of it is a love marriage or arranged marriage?
This question along with Dr. Chopra’s response appeared in Times of India dated 21st March, 2010.
While admiring the response of Dr. Chopra, this question has tempted me to share a chapter from my work “Don’t Regret Later”, even though it does not appear in the present edition of the book, which caters mainly to the senior school students.
Real Meaning of Marriage
To make a man happy , a woman has to be loving, compassionate and very sympathetic. She has to stimulate his mind and keep him alert and interested. Most of all she has to inspire him to reach for the stars – Dame Barbara Cartland
A great marriage is not when the perfect couple comes together. It is when an imperfect couple learns to enjoy their differences – Dave Mecerer
It would be worth the while to consider the entire process leading to a ceremony called “marriage”, quite typically in our society.
The parents of the eligible grooms and brides generally have predefined standards of elimination/selection of the prospective families considered worthy enough to be ‘acquired’ or ‘merged with’. Their net worth, market standing in terms of social status, place of domicile, mother tongue, religion, and even caste (who says the caste system is dead?) are the primary common factors applicable to both brides as well as the grooms side of the families.
For prospective grooms – their physical statistics, color of skin, present earnings, and the future potential earnings, education are another factors considered. If he smokes and drinks occasionally, and has friends belonging to the opposite sex, then these do raise some eyebrows. If he is working abroad, then his net worth goes up exponentially (who says foreign brands do not command a premium)
For the prospective brides, the critical minimum determinants are the physical characteristics which would include the length of the hair, the color of her skin, and the health of eyes (the moral right to wear spectacles is perhaps restricted to males only)
After these conditions are met, comes the next stage – which is matching of the horoscopes . (How many of us recollect those predictions by learned astrologers in our own cases, which actually came true? Then why do we rely so much on these documents when it comes to the most critical decision of our life, which can make or mar not only our own lives but also those of the immediate relations as well? By the way, today’s youths pride themselves of being far better educated and being better informed than their previous generations.)
The period of courtship which follows immediately after the engagement ceremony is generally treated as nothing but a social sanction to date. No wonder it is called the best period in marital life. If only it were treated as an occasion for frank discussions, and familiarizing each other with the family cultures, intended lifestyles etc. to create realistic expectations on both sides, things would be far better for the young couple post marriage. And should any serious indication of non compatibility between the two come up, then the young couple should seriously reconsider the proposed plan to go ahead and tie the knot. Without aiming to sound pessimistic, it needs to be emphasized that broken engagement is any day far better than a unhappy marriage.
The ceremonies that follow are nothing but a means of decadent exhibitionism aimed at claiming a higher status in the society, of which we ourselves are not convinced about . ( Who says showmanship is restricted to the world of entertainment?).
In most of the cases , right from the time an alliance is finalized till the wedding ceremony is over, the usual topic of discussion within the families involved as well as others , includes : what all the other side has gifted to their respective son in law and daughter in law, the quantity and quality of various wedding related functions organized by the bride’s and the groom’s side of the family, the likely expenses incurred in each function, etc etc. This lasts only for a few days after the wedding related ceremonies are over, as people move on with their lives and usually forget what they saw, what they ate in all those functions.
When the newly married couple returns from their honeymoon, they now face the reality , and the acid test begins.
Now, irrespective of the number of functions which the bride and the groom’s side had organized, irrespective of the amount of money spent by each side on those extravaganzas, irrespective of the number and profile of the guests who attended those functions, and irrespective of the showmanship exhibited by each side on those functions, the one and only one critical factor which can now bring happiness, satisfaction, peace of mind, and a sense of fulfillment to the newly married couple as well as to their respective parents is –
“ Has the young couple passed the acid test, and have proved to each other that they are truly made for each other, and can now live happily ever after? ”
Isn’t it a sheer miracle , if the marriages solemnized after such series of tests have the capacity to withstand the harsh realities of life such as the cultural differences between the families, bloated expectations of not only of the bride and the groom with each other, but also of their respective families from each other ?
It is amazing that the bride is often subjected to a microscopic scrutiny right after the return from honeymoon , and is expected to perform from day one in accordance to the culture of the family she is married into. Any deviation from the norm which may happen out of sheer innocence on the part of the bride is looked down upon. The real culprits behind such issues are generally those who are very closely related to the family of the groom, and who just want to make life miserable for the newly married couple .
The fallouts of such marriages include – extra marital affairs, confused and underdeveloped children, and loss of self esteem which can play havoc with one’s life etc.
No doubt, the so called ‘love marriages’, which actually defy the conventional (read absurd) method of arranging marriages as detailed above, also do run into problems. The solution does not lie in discarding one method in favor of another. Rather it calls for a realization that a marriage is not just a passport to a high social and economic status. It is a union of two minds and souls deciding to partner with each other to fight the battle of life, which ends only in the grave. The bodies in which such souls and minds live, need not profess the same faith, speak the same mother tongue, or originate from the same society.
A marriage that actually results in such a union could be the best possible dowry for the groom, and best possible home for the bride.
Big Deal, isn’t it?
“
This question along with Dr. Chopra’s response appeared in Times of India dated 21st March, 2010.
While admiring the response of Dr. Chopra, this question has tempted me to share a chapter from my work “Don’t Regret Later”, even though it does not appear in the present edition of the book, which caters mainly to the senior school students.
Real Meaning of Marriage
To make a man happy , a woman has to be loving, compassionate and very sympathetic. She has to stimulate his mind and keep him alert and interested. Most of all she has to inspire him to reach for the stars – Dame Barbara Cartland
A great marriage is not when the perfect couple comes together. It is when an imperfect couple learns to enjoy their differences – Dave Mecerer
It would be worth the while to consider the entire process leading to a ceremony called “marriage”, quite typically in our society.
The parents of the eligible grooms and brides generally have predefined standards of elimination/selection of the prospective families considered worthy enough to be ‘acquired’ or ‘merged with’. Their net worth, market standing in terms of social status, place of domicile, mother tongue, religion, and even caste (who says the caste system is dead?) are the primary common factors applicable to both brides as well as the grooms side of the families.
For prospective grooms – their physical statistics, color of skin, present earnings, and the future potential earnings, education are another factors considered. If he smokes and drinks occasionally, and has friends belonging to the opposite sex, then these do raise some eyebrows. If he is working abroad, then his net worth goes up exponentially (who says foreign brands do not command a premium)
For the prospective brides, the critical minimum determinants are the physical characteristics which would include the length of the hair, the color of her skin, and the health of eyes (the moral right to wear spectacles is perhaps restricted to males only)
After these conditions are met, comes the next stage – which is matching of the horoscopes . (How many of us recollect those predictions by learned astrologers in our own cases, which actually came true? Then why do we rely so much on these documents when it comes to the most critical decision of our life, which can make or mar not only our own lives but also those of the immediate relations as well? By the way, today’s youths pride themselves of being far better educated and being better informed than their previous generations.)
The period of courtship which follows immediately after the engagement ceremony is generally treated as nothing but a social sanction to date. No wonder it is called the best period in marital life. If only it were treated as an occasion for frank discussions, and familiarizing each other with the family cultures, intended lifestyles etc. to create realistic expectations on both sides, things would be far better for the young couple post marriage. And should any serious indication of non compatibility between the two come up, then the young couple should seriously reconsider the proposed plan to go ahead and tie the knot. Without aiming to sound pessimistic, it needs to be emphasized that broken engagement is any day far better than a unhappy marriage.
The ceremonies that follow are nothing but a means of decadent exhibitionism aimed at claiming a higher status in the society, of which we ourselves are not convinced about . ( Who says showmanship is restricted to the world of entertainment?).
In most of the cases , right from the time an alliance is finalized till the wedding ceremony is over, the usual topic of discussion within the families involved as well as others , includes : what all the other side has gifted to their respective son in law and daughter in law, the quantity and quality of various wedding related functions organized by the bride’s and the groom’s side of the family, the likely expenses incurred in each function, etc etc. This lasts only for a few days after the wedding related ceremonies are over, as people move on with their lives and usually forget what they saw, what they ate in all those functions.
When the newly married couple returns from their honeymoon, they now face the reality , and the acid test begins.
Now, irrespective of the number of functions which the bride and the groom’s side had organized, irrespective of the amount of money spent by each side on those extravaganzas, irrespective of the number and profile of the guests who attended those functions, and irrespective of the showmanship exhibited by each side on those functions, the one and only one critical factor which can now bring happiness, satisfaction, peace of mind, and a sense of fulfillment to the newly married couple as well as to their respective parents is –
“ Has the young couple passed the acid test, and have proved to each other that they are truly made for each other, and can now live happily ever after? ”
Isn’t it a sheer miracle , if the marriages solemnized after such series of tests have the capacity to withstand the harsh realities of life such as the cultural differences between the families, bloated expectations of not only of the bride and the groom with each other, but also of their respective families from each other ?
It is amazing that the bride is often subjected to a microscopic scrutiny right after the return from honeymoon , and is expected to perform from day one in accordance to the culture of the family she is married into. Any deviation from the norm which may happen out of sheer innocence on the part of the bride is looked down upon. The real culprits behind such issues are generally those who are very closely related to the family of the groom, and who just want to make life miserable for the newly married couple .
The fallouts of such marriages include – extra marital affairs, confused and underdeveloped children, and loss of self esteem which can play havoc with one’s life etc.
No doubt, the so called ‘love marriages’, which actually defy the conventional (read absurd) method of arranging marriages as detailed above, also do run into problems. The solution does not lie in discarding one method in favor of another. Rather it calls for a realization that a marriage is not just a passport to a high social and economic status. It is a union of two minds and souls deciding to partner with each other to fight the battle of life, which ends only in the grave. The bodies in which such souls and minds live, need not profess the same faith, speak the same mother tongue, or originate from the same society.
A marriage that actually results in such a union could be the best possible dowry for the groom, and best possible home for the bride.
Big Deal, isn’t it?
Thursday, March 11, 2010
A feedback on the book 'Don't Regret Later"
"Teenage is a period of little knowledge and abundant confidence. A dangerous mix. Teens consider people less than their own age as children and those above their age as fossils with old thoughts and ideas. The opinions of children and fossils do not matter, so teens are generally very wrapped up in their own world. The only time they listen is when... See More they fall flat on their noses. But that window of attention is very small. Teens dread advice esp. from parents. To top it all, this is the period when critical career altering decisions have to be taken.
Navneet, you have made a wonderful attempt to share experiences and learnings. The way you have defined maturity, your thoughts on learning from experiences, making good friends, setting targets, appreciating the wisdom of elders are very appreciable. I have been recommending your book to parents ever since I read it.
I hope your experiences and learnings of so many years, which you have so painstakingly compiled in a book, change the lives of youngsters. You have made a very positive contribution. Hope you keep writing."
- Rajesh Chaubey
Navneet, you have made a wonderful attempt to share experiences and learnings. The way you have defined maturity, your thoughts on learning from experiences, making good friends, setting targets, appreciating the wisdom of elders are very appreciable. I have been recommending your book to parents ever since I read it.
I hope your experiences and learnings of so many years, which you have so painstakingly compiled in a book, change the lives of youngsters. You have made a very positive contribution. Hope you keep writing."
- Rajesh Chaubey
Monday, March 8, 2010
A Question Posed to Dr. Deepak Chopra
Times of India dated 7th March, 2010. A reader poses a question to Dr. Deepak Chopra:
" I've been married twice. The First time was a love marriage and this time, it's like a typical arranged marriage. I've been living with my husband for more than two months now, away from his parents as well as mine. Now, the bone of contention between us is his mother, whom he wants me to obey and please. I have explained many a time that there's a limit to how much I can do. My husband too was married before and his previous marriage was destroyed mainly because of his mother's intervention. Now, I fear that he expects me to keep his mother with us forever."
Without intending to contest the response in any manner of Dr. Chopra, whom I hold in high esteem, I am highlighting a chapter from my work, "Don't Regret Later', as a possible rejoinder to the same :
Be Prepared Before Getting Married
Half the troubles of this life can be traced to saying “Yes” too quickly and not saying “No” too soon – Josh Billings
Almost no one is foolish enough to imagine that he automatically deserves great success in any field of activity, yet almost everyone believes that he automatically deserves success in marriage – Sydney Harris
You a young man and well settled professionally, have finally decided to get married. But are you really prepared to get married ?
Don’t be surprised at this statement, as most of us who get married are adults and also perhaps well settled in our professional lives. But some do not bother to prepare enough ground work to see that their married lives are happy and peaceful.
Some of the critical questions to ponder upon are :
“While I am staying in my house where I have been staying for the last so many years, with my parents with whom I have been staying ever since I was born, and I have well established equations with my parents, brothers, and sisters, will my wife be able to establish equally good relationships with all, and would she be able to be comfortable in this house ? What if there is an misunderstanding between my wife and my mother, or sister or sister in law , what role do I need to play? “
Have you even bothered to sit with your family members to reflect upon such issues which are likely to come up ? Or have you even bothered to discuss the layout and other arrangements of your house with your fiancée to find out if she would be comfortable or not ?
Then , when your wife is expecting your first child, are you all ensuring that she is well looked after ? After all, she is adding a new member to your family. After the child is born, is she being extended adequate helping hand so that she does not feel unnecessarily burdened. Remember, for a first time mother, even a few hours of sound sleep is luxury.
It is a part of our social custom,, that married men do not entertain any suggestions from their in laws side as it is considered to be an interference. But then, some married men also tend to forget that if their better half is unhappy, and she does not get any support from her in laws side, she would perhaps have no other option but to turn to her parents for help. Her parents too would up to a certain point advise her to tackle the situation patiently, but beyond that point, they might be provoked to confront the situation with their son in law and his family.
This may be unpleasant, but then have you and your family done enough to preempt such a situation. Yes, there could be situations where the wife may be unreasonable. Here, it would be in order for the men to have a frank chat with the wife on a one to one basis, and then help her see reason in what she is doing is wrong. If after all attempts the things do not improve, then the men have no choice but to open a dialog with the in laws. It requires ample courage, but then maybe the in laws can help where others have failed.
One advise I got from my cousin who is a couple of years elder to me. He said , “ Can you imagine the kind of challenges which your would be wife is likely to face after marriage ?” I wondered what he meant, and asked him to elaborate.
He continued, “ Well , you have been a part of your family ever since you were born and this is thirty years now. You know your parents ,and your siblings inside out by now. You must have had lots of misunderstandings with your other siblings and even with your parents, you must have also fought with them on various issues and would have also used unpleasant tones with them at times. Then, you might not have been on talking terms with them for quite some time, and one fine day would have decided to break the ice automatically. I am sure, for the rest of your life such kind of periodic misunderstandings and fights between you and your other siblings and your parents is not ruled out. But you need not make any special efforts to maintain your equations with your immediate family members, and others such as your aunts, uncles, nephews, nieces etc.
Now , have you considered what all efforts your would be wife would have to make to establish your level of equation with all your close and distant relations? And above all, considering our kind of society where the expectations from a newly married girl are sky high especially from her in laws, what all would it take for her to live up to these expectations? Her first link to all your relatives is you, and you have to be her friend philosopher and guide , and at times become her protector when she is being unfairly targeted by someone in your family may be even your parents or brother or sister. This is one of the most important secrets of a successful marriage.” He concluded.
Certainly, there was much merit in these words.
While these are not exhaustive details of the kind of preparation required especially by the groom’s side, to ensure a happy and trouble free married life, yet these do form some of the most basic and critical issues which if ignored before marriage, could create serious problems later on.
But the key issue is, how many prospective grooms and brides bother to even reflect upon the same and work upon it, rather than leaving the same to be taken care of by their respective destinies?
How I wish the answer to this question was encouraging!!!
" I've been married twice. The First time was a love marriage and this time, it's like a typical arranged marriage. I've been living with my husband for more than two months now, away from his parents as well as mine. Now, the bone of contention between us is his mother, whom he wants me to obey and please. I have explained many a time that there's a limit to how much I can do. My husband too was married before and his previous marriage was destroyed mainly because of his mother's intervention. Now, I fear that he expects me to keep his mother with us forever."
Without intending to contest the response in any manner of Dr. Chopra, whom I hold in high esteem, I am highlighting a chapter from my work, "Don't Regret Later', as a possible rejoinder to the same :
Be Prepared Before Getting Married
Half the troubles of this life can be traced to saying “Yes” too quickly and not saying “No” too soon – Josh Billings
Almost no one is foolish enough to imagine that he automatically deserves great success in any field of activity, yet almost everyone believes that he automatically deserves success in marriage – Sydney Harris
You a young man and well settled professionally, have finally decided to get married. But are you really prepared to get married ?
Don’t be surprised at this statement, as most of us who get married are adults and also perhaps well settled in our professional lives. But some do not bother to prepare enough ground work to see that their married lives are happy and peaceful.
Some of the critical questions to ponder upon are :
“While I am staying in my house where I have been staying for the last so many years, with my parents with whom I have been staying ever since I was born, and I have well established equations with my parents, brothers, and sisters, will my wife be able to establish equally good relationships with all, and would she be able to be comfortable in this house ? What if there is an misunderstanding between my wife and my mother, or sister or sister in law , what role do I need to play? “
Have you even bothered to sit with your family members to reflect upon such issues which are likely to come up ? Or have you even bothered to discuss the layout and other arrangements of your house with your fiancée to find out if she would be comfortable or not ?
Then , when your wife is expecting your first child, are you all ensuring that she is well looked after ? After all, she is adding a new member to your family. After the child is born, is she being extended adequate helping hand so that she does not feel unnecessarily burdened. Remember, for a first time mother, even a few hours of sound sleep is luxury.
It is a part of our social custom,, that married men do not entertain any suggestions from their in laws side as it is considered to be an interference. But then, some married men also tend to forget that if their better half is unhappy, and she does not get any support from her in laws side, she would perhaps have no other option but to turn to her parents for help. Her parents too would up to a certain point advise her to tackle the situation patiently, but beyond that point, they might be provoked to confront the situation with their son in law and his family.
This may be unpleasant, but then have you and your family done enough to preempt such a situation. Yes, there could be situations where the wife may be unreasonable. Here, it would be in order for the men to have a frank chat with the wife on a one to one basis, and then help her see reason in what she is doing is wrong. If after all attempts the things do not improve, then the men have no choice but to open a dialog with the in laws. It requires ample courage, but then maybe the in laws can help where others have failed.
One advise I got from my cousin who is a couple of years elder to me. He said , “ Can you imagine the kind of challenges which your would be wife is likely to face after marriage ?” I wondered what he meant, and asked him to elaborate.
He continued, “ Well , you have been a part of your family ever since you were born and this is thirty years now. You know your parents ,and your siblings inside out by now. You must have had lots of misunderstandings with your other siblings and even with your parents, you must have also fought with them on various issues and would have also used unpleasant tones with them at times. Then, you might not have been on talking terms with them for quite some time, and one fine day would have decided to break the ice automatically. I am sure, for the rest of your life such kind of periodic misunderstandings and fights between you and your other siblings and your parents is not ruled out. But you need not make any special efforts to maintain your equations with your immediate family members, and others such as your aunts, uncles, nephews, nieces etc.
Now , have you considered what all efforts your would be wife would have to make to establish your level of equation with all your close and distant relations? And above all, considering our kind of society where the expectations from a newly married girl are sky high especially from her in laws, what all would it take for her to live up to these expectations? Her first link to all your relatives is you, and you have to be her friend philosopher and guide , and at times become her protector when she is being unfairly targeted by someone in your family may be even your parents or brother or sister. This is one of the most important secrets of a successful marriage.” He concluded.
Certainly, there was much merit in these words.
While these are not exhaustive details of the kind of preparation required especially by the groom’s side, to ensure a happy and trouble free married life, yet these do form some of the most basic and critical issues which if ignored before marriage, could create serious problems later on.
But the key issue is, how many prospective grooms and brides bother to even reflect upon the same and work upon it, rather than leaving the same to be taken care of by their respective destinies?
How I wish the answer to this question was encouraging!!!
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